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How To Know If Your Spirit Guides Are Guiding You

This is our 3rd episode in the new format, and I sincerely thank you for all your supportive feedback. Today we’re going to delve into some pretty deep questions like, Where Are My Spirit Guides When Things Go Wrong? Discover the 3 angles to consider when your spirit guides seem to be missing in action. And learn the 4 ways our spirit guides communicate with us.

Later in the show, I know you’ll love Jessica’s story about her after-death communication with her ex-fiance—his ability to communicate is extraordinary. And Tammy asks why her children have had dream visitations with their dad but he has yet to show up in her dreams—a very common question that I’ll answer.

Finally, I share my experiences at a 5-day past-life regression workshop presented by Dr. Brian Weiss in case you want to attend the next one. And I share a true story from my own life that taught me why it’s important to stay in the present moment. I’ve been enjoying hearing your stories and questions and hope you’ll continue to share with us on Afterlife TV. Enjoy the episode! ~ Bob Olson, Afterlife TV

PS, Don’t miss the very special GIVEAWAY opportunity mentioned in the show! And gratitude to my wife, Melissa, for her gorgeous photography for this video.

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Afterlife TV is presented by Afterlife Investigator & Psychic Medium Researcher Bob Olson, who is the author of Answers about the Afterlife: A Private Investigator’s 15-Year Research Unlocks the Mysteries of Life after Death.

Check out Bob Olson’s other sites: (a directory of hundreds of psychics & mediums by location with reviews & Instant Readings) & (his personal recommended list of tested psychics and mediums) or visit Bob’s Facebook Page. Bob also has a popular workshop for psychics and mediums at

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Announcer: Meet Bob Olson, Bob’s the author of “Answers about the Afterlife” and the host of Afterlife TV.” A private investigator who began investigating life after death in 1999, Bob now records his interviews with experts, authors and people who’ve had extraordinary experiences so he can share it all with you. Enjoy the show.

Bob: Hey everybody, Bob Olson here with Afterlife TV. This is where we talk about life after death and answer the meaningful questions around that subject. You can find us at You . can also find us on YouTube and iTunes as a podcast. Just look for Afterlife TV with Bob Olson.

I want to thank our sponsor, This is where you can find over 800 psychics and mediums and Tarot readers and animal communicators and energy healers all in one place. You can look them up by location, you can look them up by specialty, you can read public reviews about them, and you can either schedule a reading with them directly or get an instant reading, That means get a reading right there on the site with whoever’s available at that very moment. Again,

I also want to thank you for listening, and I also want to thank you especially for your really incredibly loving and supportive and enthusiastic comments about the show here, especially the new format. This is the third episode in the new format. I know a lot of you are really beginning to enjoy it. It offers a lot of variety by having these different segments rather than just one particular subject throughout the whole show.
I have found that if we can keep a theme going within the show and maybe veer off here and there within the show, it certainly helps, because then we have a headline that we can at least let you know what most of the show, not all of the show, but most of the show is going to be about.

But anyway I want to thank you so much for all your comments on Facebook and YouTube and and Twitter. I’m really grateful for the interaction that I get from each and every one of you. Today we’re going to talk about, are we being guided when we’re faced with challenges? So many of us ask, “Hey, where are my spirit guides when things go wrong?”

So I want to really discuss the subject, because the fact is we’re always being guided. So I think we can come at this question from three different angles. The first angle is a little bit cliché, but it’s an accurate cliché, which is the idea that when one door closes another one opens. Now, that might sound very New Age-ey, but the fact is this is the way life works, and couple of examples of that would be when your boyfriend or girlfriend breaks up with you you go through sort of a grief period after that, and so many people find that they end up with someone who’s even better, they end up with someone who is more supportive and more loving, maybe the love of their life.

Some people get fired from their jobs, and then only after a period of a lot of fear and worry, and hassle, of course, they end up finding a better job. Maybe better pay, maybe they enjoy going to work more, maybe they have better coworkers, and for some people it might be their dream job. This is what happens in life, this is the way life works, even with health challenges.

Sometimes we have a health challenge that comes up. It’s easy to say, “Uh, I wasn’t being guided, where are my guys now,” when sometimes what that health challenge does is it leads us to treat our bodies better. We eat better, we maybe stop smoking, drink alcohol less, start exercising and we become healthier than ever. We might be in the best health of our lives.

So there’s purpose in these things happening. That’s really the first angle I wanted to look at when we’re questioning whether our spirit guides are paying attention. Are they off doing something else, did they forget about me? No, they’re paying attention to you, so sometimes you just have to trust, ah, maybe this is something I need to go through in order to come out the other side in a better light.

If that’s not the case, the second angle that we can look at this at is sometimes we’re responsible for the things that are happening in our lives. And it’s always a good thing for us to take responsibility for our part in the reality that we’re living, right? So in this case I would talk more about our free will choices and how they get in the way. I talked about this a little bit in the first new episode, so this is the third one. In the very first one I talked about how the thoughts that we think, the words that we either write or speak and the actions that we take are really important in terms of how we create our reality, how we create our future.

Give you some more descriptive examples of that. What we think about and what we ruminate on, for instance, is sending out a vibration that’s going to attract like vibration, things, people, events with a similar vibration. We’re going to be attracting that into our lives. What we talk about with others.

Do you talk with your friends about everything that’s going wrong with the world, do you complain about your life, complain about work, complain about your boss, complain about your spouse, complain about other friends, or are you more often talking in a positive light? Are you more often talking about what’s great in your life? Are you that kind of person who is more likely when you get together with your friends or even coworkers, you’re sort of sharing some of the wonderful things that have been happening in your life, or are you just the opposite of that? Are you someone who is really focusing on the negative? That makes a big difference in our lives, and what we attract into our lives, yes, you could call that the law of attraction, I just look at it as the universe responds to what we put out there, it responds to our vibration.

I’ll give you an example. I remember years ago I went through a depression, this was in the ’90s, early ’90s, and I went through a depression. Some days that were better than others, and I knew that on those days when I was really dealing with a chronic depression, I knew that it was just not a good idea that I even left the house. I was in just such an uncomfortable, miserable state of mind that for me to go out in the world I was only going to attract lousy things. I was more likely to get pulled over by the police even if I wasn’t speeding or anything. There would be something, there would be something in my energy that would attract that sort of thing. Or I would run into other people who were kind of crabby and miserable and weren’t very nice to me as a result.

Certainly I was more sensitive, so that just added to the whole snowball effect of what happens when we have these negative states of mind. Now, if you’re not dealing with a chemical imbalance in your brain, then we have control over those sorts of things. As I said, I knew uh, I’m feeling lousy today. I shouldn’t even go out. I’m only going to attract those things that I don’t want in my life. So therefore it was safer for me to stay home, I knew that, ad wait until I was feeling better.

Well, if we’re not dealing with that type of a disorder, and we wake up in the morning, and it’s more that we’ve been focusing on about what your friends or your child or your coworkers are doing that you’re unhappy about, if you focus on that, especially if you focus on that for an hour or two, you’re chatting with your friends or your spouse about this all morning, that is going to create your day. If instead you think about what your dreams and desires are and what you’re looking forward to in the future, that’s going to create your day as well. You’re going to feel uplifted and your vibration is going to be higher, and therefore you’re going to have a better day overall.

Now, I also talk about actions, and actions, how do I explain this? Our actions and our thoughts need to be in alignment if we’re trying to raise our vibration. If you say you want to be healthier but then you go and eat a bag of potato chips, your actions are out of alignment with what you’re claiming that you desire. If you say that you want to save money but then you go and you blow your whole paycheck at the casino, again, your actions are out of alignment with what your words are saying that you want.

Give you a last one. If you say you want more happiness in your life, but, as I explained earlier, you’re complaining about your job or the economy or politics, certainly something that a lot of people are thinking about right now, but if you’re doing it in such a negative way, not thinking about what you want in a positive way, but thinking about things in a negative way, that’s going to set you up for failure. And when things go bad, in other words, when negative things happen, when challenges come your way, then we can’t blame our spirit guides for that. Our spirit guides are doing all they can to try to guide us in the right direction to accomplish what we came here as human beings to experience, and then our free will sort of takes hold and says, “No, I’m not going to follow what my intuition is telling me to do. Instead I’m in a lousy mood, and I’m going to do this.” And so we have to watch our thoughts, our words, and our actions to make sure that they’re all in alignment to attract that which we desire.

So this is really all about raising our vibration. What does that mean? I’m talking about your mood, your attitude. There are ways that we can do that. If you wake up one day and you’re kind of in a lousy mood, who knows why that happens, you might have had a bad dream. You don’t know. There’s a lot of chemicals in our brain that are doing all kinds of crazy things, right?

You just never really know why we get in these moods, but we do have the ability. Unless you’re dealing with a mental illness that is working against you, you do have the ability to uplift your mood, uplift, change in a positive way your attitude. One great way that so many of us are aware of is we can listen to music, listen to music that makes you feel good. I just have certain artists that I listen to all the time, because when I listen to them I end up in a better mood. And sometimes it’s about being around other people, people who uplift you.

It’s funny, a lot of times I see going to the barber as a hassle, “Ugh, I got to go to the barber.” It takes so much time. Never know if there’s going to be a long wait or something. And I’m always busy working, so to take that time to go and get a haircut just seems like a hassle. And yet, every single time I do it, I come back, I leave the barber shop, and I feel better than when I left to even drive there.

Why is that? They’re just uplifting people. They are people who are usually in a good mood, and they make me feel better when I leave than when I walked in. Those are the kind of people that we want to surround ourselves with. So spend less time with pessimistic and fatalistic friends and family members and spend more time with positive, inspiring friends, even if that means you need to go out and find a new set of friends.

That doesn’t mean leave the old friends behind entirely. Just spend more time with people that make you feel better and less time with people who lower your energy, lower your mood, bring down your attitude, make you feel negative, ultimately lowering your vibration or your frequency.

The other thing is I eventually learned I had to stop watching the news. When I watch the news I become fearful. I start worrying about things. I am reminded of all the terrible things that are going on in the world, because the news typically focuses on that. And so I had to watch less and less news on TV, because that was filling up the, we’ll say the half hour or the hour of that show, that news show, more than the positive stories that they were presenting. We all know this, we all know this is true.

Now what I do when I’ve been working too hard, I say to Melissa, I say, “Oh, my brain’s frying. It’s like smoke’s coming out of my ears, I’m dealing with a lot of stuff, I’m juggling a lot right now. I need to clear my mind, I need to take a break.” And what I’ll do is I’ll go and eat my lunch in front of the television and watch a sitcom, something that makes me laugh, because I watch it on Netflix or something. A half hour show is like 20 minutes, so that gives me 20 minutes to think about nothing but this silly TV show that makes me laugh, and it’s a great way to clear my mind, reset my energy, get my vibration back to something more positive, and then I’m ready to go back and tackle more of what I need to do. And of course, if you think about the show, I need to be uplifted, I want this show to be uplifting. And for a lot of people, this is one of the things that they either watch or listen to in order to uplift their energy.

So many listeners have told me so, and I’m happy that the show does that for you. So number one is having the faith that when one door closes another door opens and leads us to something even better, and that is being guided. Sometimes you hear the train coming, and at first you hear it. It’s far away and it’s like a whisper right? And then it gets closer and closer, and before you know it, that train is screaming at you. And if we’re not paying attention to the whispers, then we get the screams, and that’s what happens in our life.

So sometimes we end up with the breakup or getting fired or the health challenge or the financial challenge, whatever it is that’s going to change our direction so that we’re making a right-hand turn or doing a 180 degree turn, whatever it may be, whatever’s necessary to get up back on the right track. So that was the number one angle that I wanted to look at, this question of, where are my spirit guides when things are going wrong?

And then the second one is paying attention to our free will choices in reference to our words, our thoughts, and our actions. Well, the third angle that we’re going to look at is helping our spirit guides to communicate with us by becoming more aware of their communications. And our spirit guides communicate with us in four different ways. On page 93 of my book “Answers about the Afterlife,” there’s a question, in what ways do my spirit guides communicate with me?

Now, I’m not going to read the whole thing, but I’ll read the gist of it so we know what those four ways are. The first one is intuition. Our spirit guides communicate to us, guide us through intuition.

Everyone has intuition. I’m not talking about psychic ability although psychic ability is just enhanced intuition. Nevertheless, your intuition is nothing more than your inner sense about things, your gut feelings, your personal instincts and those spontaneous thoughts that pop into your mind. It’s important that you learn to follow these signals, because much of this guidance is from your spirit guides.

The second one is coincidence. That’s the second way that our guides communicate with us. Some call this divine coincidence, or synchronicity. Unfortunately, many people erroneously use the word coincidence to mean luck, fluke, or chance, which is the kind of shortsightedness that would lead one to overlook valuable guidance from their spirit guides.

Coincidence is when two or more events occur that have no obvious relation to each other, yet result in a meaningful connection or result. So if you have three totally unrelated people recommend that you see Chicago at the local playhouse this weekend, that’s a coincidence that might be a message from your spirit guides. What’s the message? Well, the possibilities are endless, but it could be that you’ll meet someone there who will positively affect the rest of your life.

Alright messengers, the third way that our spirit guides communicate with us. Messengers can be people, animals or things. For example, you might be fretting about how you’re going to pay a bill when a stranger on the subway tells you that she just traded in her unwanted gold jewelry for hundreds of dollars. Or you might be watching TV and see a segment on dangerous toys only to discover that your granddaughter has one of those toys in her crib. Or you might be walking your dog down the street when your dog suddenly stops, turns around and begins walking the other way, only to learn the next day that a man was robbed on that same street around that same time of day that you were walking.

This is how spirit guides communicate with us through messengers. If they can find a messenger to deliver this or lead us in the right direction they’ll do it.

Number four, events. The fourth most common method spirit guides use to communicate with us and guide us is through events, things that happen to us or around us. I talked about getting fired and then finding a better job, I talked about having a breakup and then finding a better relationship on the other side. Here’s another example. Or you might even break your ankle and begin writing that novel you’ve always dreamed of writing, which might become a New York Times bestseller.

I actually knew someone who lost their job for over a year. This is when the internet bubble burst, and a lot of tech jobs were falling by the wayside. I knew someone who was in one of those jobs, and he was out of work for a long time. He was trying to match his income that he had in his prior job, and it seemed impossible to him.

In his spare time, because he had so much time in between looking for a new job, he started writing a book, and that book ended up taking him into a whole new career. The only way his spirit guides might have been able to get him to that place was to get him to lose his job. So he had so much time on his hands that he actually started writing. Now, this wasn’t necessary if he was feeling the need to write, but he just couldn’t get himself to do it, so his spirit guides might have thought, “Well, we now how to make that happen.”

It continues to say when our spirit guides communicate with us or guide us via events, it’s not always going to be a seemingly negative event like getting fired or breaking an ankle. It can also be wonderful events. I met a woman who found a wallet once and ended up marrying the man who owned it. Melissa and I were given tickets to a conference one time, and this is where we met a woman who became one of our closest friends from that day on. That was a decade ago. Both her and her husband, very close friends of ours.

So that’s on page 93 of “Answers about the Afterlife.” You can find that book, “Answers about the Afterlife,” on

So if you’re wondering why you’ve sort of run into some challenges, some obstacles along the way, maybe things aren’t going the way you would like them to go, you now have three different angles from which to look at your situation and just decide, is this something I’m responsible for, is this something that needs to happen because I have been unhappy in this situation and this is leading me to a whole new situation that could certainly turn out to be better, or maybe I just haven’t been paying attention to the communications that I’ve been getting from my spirit guides in terms of intuition, coincidences, messengers or events. Pay attention to those from this point on, and you will see that your spirit guides are communicating with you. Maybe you just haven’t had enough of an awareness in order to recognize the guidance that they’re giving you.

Jessica: My name is Jessica, and my story takes place six years ago. At the time I was talking to my mom on the phone, reading a newspaper article at the same time, weirdly enough, and there was an article about a death, a car accident. The article didn’t give any details on the victim, but in my head I heard a voice say that it was Lorenzo, who was my ex-fiancée who I still was speaking to and had very deep feelings for. So I had a bad feeling in my stomach. I knew that he had parted, I knew that it was him. I ended up confirming that with his mother, and I was very devastated.

So I was staying back and forth between my mom and my aunt’s house, because I really needed them to lean on and to help me even just to do all the daily things that you do, because I was very lost. So I was at my aunt’s house. I ended up leaving. She called me and said, “You know my son,” who is my cousin, “was taking pictures, and he ended up catching an orb.”

I was very skeptical. She believed it was Lorenzo, I didn’t really believe it. So I go to my mom’s house. I’m staying there, I’m in the front room by myself, it’s nighttime, the TV’s on. And I felt a presence come into the room from the kitchen. It felt as if when your eyes are closed and you know that there’s somebody there, but they’re not there, or you know if someone’s coming, you just feel like just their presence coming.

So I was facing the kitchen on the couch. I ended up flipping around, and I said “Lorenzo, is that you?” I just knew it was him, I felt it. I was a little frightened, so I turned the light on, and I felt this presence. My eyes were open. There was nothing.

I didn’t see anything, but the presence came up to me. I don’t know how to explain it but to just tell you that I knew somebody was there. And I knew it was him, and he was walking up to me or floating or whatever it is that you do as a soul. He was doing that, he was making his way to me. So I just laid there, and then I felt a slight pressure on my forehead, like a kiss. It was like a tingle or as if he touched me, his soul touched my forehead.

And then just as quickly as he came, he just walked right out. I felt his presence walk right out the way he came in through the kitchen the way he came. It was really weird, but it was comforting to me in my time of need. I needed to know that he was okay, and to me that was his way of saying, “I’m okay” and also his way of saying, “I love you,” and just giving me a wonderful last kiss goodbye. So that’s my story. Hope you enjoyed it. Thanks Bob.

Bob: Jessica, thank you so much for sharing your story with us. There are so many aspects of this story that I loved. Now, first of all, I’ll let you know that I was in my car in a parking lot waiting for somebody, sitting there by myself, when an announcement came into my iPhone about the story, so I decided to listen to it. And I just really enjoy your sense of humor, so I was literally laughing out loud all by myself there in my car as people were walking by.

I’m going to start with you’re reading the article about the car accident, and you immediately knew that it was Lorenzo that had passed. This really speaks to the ability that we all have, both our psychic ability and later in the story our mediumistic ability, our ability to communicate with a spirit. You probably have a stronger ability than many people. I suspect you have a stronger ability than I do. I’ve never had this experience.

But what’s really cool about it is that you knew that the person who had passed in the accident regarding the article you were reading was Lorenzo. You trusted that, and yet you still have a certain amount of skepticism when your aunt told you about your cousin’s photograph and seeing the orb in the photo. So this is great contrast going on here between what you knew, what you had as a knowing, and what you were still skeptical about.

I also thought it was again humorous and wonderful when you told the story about when Lorenzo visited you. One of the things that I liked, at first you knew it was him. You just knew it was him. You felt the presence, you knew it was him, but I laughed because you turned the light on. Now, some people would be afraid to turn the light on, fearing that the presence might go away, but no, you had a surety about what it was that was happening at that moment.

You turned the light on. That helped reduce your fears, which is a good thing, because it probably helped you to allow the experience to keep going. And then you were talking about how he was walking or floating up to you, another moment where I laughed. I never really thought about it that way, walking, floating. Who really knows what they’re doing, right? Probably, for your sake, trying to give you the sense that he was walking up to you from the kitchen, and then he left through the kitchen, maybe to make it feel more human like.

People wouldn’t just pop into a room. They would come from another room. And then, oh my goodness, I know that so many After Life TV listeners are going to be envious of your experience, because you felt the pressure on your forehead that you interpreted and I interpret it too as a kiss. Of course he did that. And then the communication that he gave you that one, he’s okay, and two, that he loves you.

These are very common communications. The first thing that our loved ones in spirit want us to know is that they’re okay, and they also want us to know that they love us. They want to remind us that they love us. So, very common. If you heard a million other experiences that were similar to yours, those are probably the most common communications that would come through. So I want to thank you for sharing your experience with us.

The last thing I just want to say is we have a question coming up, and it’s sort of a question/experience coming up, and it involves somebody’s ex-husband. In this case, it was your ex, your ex-boyfriend. It really doesn’t matter. I think it’s just a great example.

If it’s somebody you loved and somebody you still love, it doesn’t matter what kind of issues we had in life. Just because we can’t live in the same house with someone doesn’t mean we don’t love them, and vice versa. Just because we have these human relationship issues doesn’t mean love doesn’t still exist when they pass and cross over to the other side. So I think your story speaks volumes for all of us, and again, I thank you for sharing with us, Jessica.

In the last episode we were talking about past lives and past life regressions, and it made me think of an experience that I had last summer. I recorded that so I could share it with you, but unfortunately there wasn’t enough time last week to actually play it, so I’m going to share that with you now. Since we’ve been talking about past lives and past life regressions, it made me think of a workshop I went to this past summer. It was a five-day workshop offered by Dr. Brian Weiss and his wife Carol that they do at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, New York.

Dr. Brian Weiss really doesn’t need any introduction. All I really need to do is say he’s the author of “Many Lives, Many Masters.” For so many people that book was the first book that they read in this field that we talk about here on Afterlife TV. Millions of people have read “Many Lives, Many Masters.” Well, that’s who offers this workshop, he and his wife Carol.

They used to do it two times a year. Now they’re doing it three times a year. I wanted to go for years, and I just really never had the opportunity. Finally, a friend of mine, she also wanted to go see Brian in this five-day workshop, and she convinced me to go with her. Sometimes I need that, just need a little push.

We went together, we actually drove in together. It was a like five and a half hour ride. We had such a blast, it was a lot of much fun. We had no idea exactly what it was that we were in for, and it ended up being one of the most extraordinary experiences of our lives.

Let me just tell you a little bit about it. So it’s a five-day workshop where they train people to facilitate past life regressions for other people. One of the things that they do of course is they show what it’s like. They bring people up on stage, and both Brian and Carol take people through a regression. Now, they do it in all sorts of different ways so that we as students get to see what it’s like using these different techniques and methods. It’s one of the coolest things to just sit there and watch these people go through these regressions, and they go into these past lives, and it’s always the most fascinating story that you’re captivated from the beginning.

If that’s all it was for five days, I would have done that alone, and it would have been well worth it. It was more than that, but that was one of my favorite parts was just listening to these regressions in their many different forms. It was also fun learning the techniques, and while I don’t do this for a living, I’m completely confident in taking anybody through a regression experience.

So you leave the five-day workshop knowing that you can do this, knowing how to do it, knowing all sorts of different techniques and tools that you have now in order to do it, but also, you just have this great confidence. So that’s another benefit to going, of course, but just being in the presence of Brian and Carol is something that, I guess you have to be there to really understand it, but if you’ve ever been to a Brian Weiss workshop, you recognize he’s so peaceful, he’s so calm. I mean he’s just smart and very witty, and so he teaches with a great sense of humor that breaks up the teaching part of it, because you’re learning, but you’re also laughing sometimes, and you’re having a good time. But because he’s such a peaceful man, it’s very calming to just be in the same room and listening to his voice for so long.

But one of the wonderful things is that at the beginning of the day and then throughout the day there were question and answer periods, so if you had questions that you wanted to ask Brian, and this would be about technique or this would just be about past lives, life after death, you could ask him pretty much anything, and he has great wisdom to share with all of us, and he would answer your questions. So you got to really experience Brian Weiss at a whole new level than you…If you’ve been to any one of his two-hour workshops, it’s sort of that on steroids, right?

Here’s another thing that I didn’t expect, is that every day you would also go through two probably on average meditations a day, usually in the morning and then towards the end of the day. Well, I’ve never meditated that much, but to be in a group like this where it’s part of the curriculum, and so you do it because it’s there, and of course it’s Brian’s voice, and he was made for guiding you through meditations. He’s had so many years of practice that he really knows the best way to bring you to a place of utter peacefulness and mindlessness. I don’t know is that the right word? That seems to be where I’d go.

So many people were having amazing experiences as a result of these meditations that we were going through. For me, I was just feeling more and more relaxed and more peaceful and more in the present moment, which certainly that’s not part of my day-to-day life. I’m very very busy, I’m always working. So much to do every single day, and to be sort of forced in a nice way for five days to be meditating a couple times a day. Well, the end effect of that, by the end of the week I was just like a noodle, I was just so relaxed. It just feels so good.

Now, his wife Carol also helps teach, and she brings people up on stage to do regressions and she too, she’s a master regressionist, and she is an amazing teacher. And I like that their styles are very different. She has a very different style. She’s so grounded and just so down to earth, and they work well together. She’s been with Brian since the beginning of all this, so she was there, and she’s been offering past life regression to people as part of her practice. She’s been doing this for so long, so she too is just a really valuable asset to be able to spend a week there, and between the two of them it just makes it a very very special event.

The only other thing I can really add to it, because obviously I enjoyed it, and I actually would consider going back again just for the experience, in other words, the way it made me feel on a day-to-day basis. But even after I left there I was inspired in so many ways to want to continue feeling the way I felt during that week. The next one is in May, May 2016, I believe. It’s from the 15th through the 20th. Check that out, and don’t hold me to this, but I think there’s another one in July and then another one in October.

So if you’re interested, I highly recommend that you get there. And don’t miss out. It’s a great experience. There’ll be a link to the workshop in the show notes on, or you can go to for more information.

So before I let you go, I got one more thing that I’m kind of excited about. While I was at the workshop last summer, I got Brian to give me a copy, a signed copy of his book “Many Lives, Many Masters.” Now, I know this book means an awful lot to so many of you. I have one copy that is signed by him that I’d like to give away. So if you go to, and this is going to be in the show notes, so if you just look for the link in the show notes, go to, or even on, there’ll be a link below the video that shows you how to get to this page.

But it’s All the instructions’ll be right there for you to enter to win this beautiful book that is signed by Brian. It’s something that you’ll just have for the rest of your life. So I’m excited to do that for you. Good luck to you.

Tammy: Hi Bob. My name is Tammy, and my story is about my ex-husband, who at the age of 49 died of a massive heart attack in his sleep. That was unfortunate enough, but my son, 19 years old at the time, was the one that found him. It was very traumatic for all of us involved, and we still struggle with it to this day.

My son has told me that his dad has come to him in dream state. He told me about a dream that happened shortly after where he was crying and holding onto his dad like it happened when he found him, but then in his dream his dad came up behind him and was holding him as he was holding the body, comforting him. I said that was probably him there letting you know that he was with you at that moment.

Our daughter has also had dreams of him visiting and in some way trying to comfort and let her know. I talk to him and think about him every day. Had 18 years with the man and two children. Regardless of a divorce, there’s a connection.

He doesn’t come to me in dream and hasn’t ever come to me in dream, and I wonder, is it because we got divorced that doesn’t? Because, again, I talk to him and ask, “Please come to me and just let me know that you’re okay. I’d love to know that, just to reassure the kids and myself, you’ve made it and that you’re happy.” And again, he hasn’t. I don’t know if I want it too bad or what is the reason, but I would really give anything to have a reading and know that he’s made it okay and confirmation that he’s there. Thank you for your time.

Bob: Thank you so much, Tammy, for sharing your son’s story, for relaying that your daughter has also had dream visitations and your question about why your ex-husband hasn’t come to you. Now, I kind of referred to this when we heard Jessica’s story, because in that case it was an ex as well, and so I hope that kind of answers through example your question about, has he not come to me in my dream because he was my ex-husband, because we got divorced? No, that’s not why he didn’t come to you in your dream, I’m sure of it.

There are many reasons why people don’t come to us in our dreams while they might go to other people that we know in their dreams. I actually answer that question in the book. I’m going to read the answer to that question and then I’m going to come back to your specific situation. On page 129 of “Answers about the Afterlife,” my book that answers 150 questions that people have about life after death, about spirits, about what their particular loved one in spirit wants or needs, all kinds of questions, including a lot of questions that people have about near-death experiences and mediums, past lives.

It’s all in there, but on page 129 we talk specifically about this question that so many people have, why did my loved one in spirit visit my sibling in a dream but not me? And you could replace sibling with my children, my friend, any other relative. Doesn’t really matter. In this case I used sibling just for the example. And my answer is there’s never any guarantee that your loved one in spirit will visit you in a dream, but you can certainly request it. Pray to your loved one and ask if they could come to you while dreaming. If they know you’re open to it and can handle it, it might happen.

Now Tammy I know that that’s something you’ve already done, so let’s keep reading and see what applies to you. I actually think the very last part of the answer for this question is what applies to you, but here we go. I’ll continue. Most people believe they would like to have a dream visitation, but you might not be as open to the experience as you may think. For one, you must be open-minded enough in terms of skepticism to allow it. Skepticism can ward off such dreams simply because you don’t believe it.

Have you ever looked all over for your car keys or sunglasses only to realize that they were right in the spot you looked all along? Many people have had this experience, and it’s because they didn’t believe their keys or sunglasses were going to be in that spot that they never saw them. This is the power of skepticism. Your loved ones in spirit know best if you might be scared by the experience of a dream visitation or confused by it, but if you are open minded and wouldn’t be scared by a visit from your loved one in your dreams, it is much more likely to occur. Your sibling might be more open to a dream visitation or might need it more.

My guess is that it’s not an easy task to show up in your dreams. So spirits are going to save it for those people who really need the experience. If your beliefs are such that you already know your loved one is okay, then it’s not necessary that your loved one in spirit endure the extra effort to appear in your dream.

On the other hand, some people dream differently than others. For instance, I rarely ever remember my dreams. So it might be a big waste of time for one of my loved ones in spirit to visit me that way. Thus, who gets a dream visitation and who doesn’t might depend on our dreaming habits. Some of us just might not dream appropriately for a dream visitation to be possible. If you’re someone who never really sleeps very deeply, this might be an issue.

Finally, because the purpose of life is experience, having a dream visitation might not be an experience your soul wants you to have. Every experience we have could lead us in a new direction. If your soul knows that you are more likely to stay on the path intended for your life by not having the dream visitation, then your soul won’t allow it, because it’s in your best interest not to experience one. On the other hand, if having a dream visitation is an experience that will benefit your life’s plan, then the possibility of having one is much greater.

In the end, I wouldn’t take it personally that your loved one visited your sibling in her dream and not you. Look at the glass as half full and be happy that your loved one showed up in anyone’s dream. Now your family has had direct contact as evidence that your loved one happily exists in the afterlife. That’s a wonderful gift regardless of who had the dream.

I think that last part certainly speaks directly to you, Tammy. I know that you sort of mentioned that you’d like for your ex-husband to come to you in your dream so that you and the kids would know he’s okay. I think the kids know that he’s okay, because they were visited by their father, but I think this is something you want for you, and it’s okay to say that. That’s not selfish. That’s something that you feel like you could really use in your life. But that second to the last paragraph where I talk about having the dream visitation might not be an experience your soul wants you to have, this could possibly be the case.

I’ll give you an example. If someone was to have a dream visitation, that might give them the confirmation that they need that their loved one is okay, that might give them the peace of mind that they’re seeking in relation to their loss, but sometimes when we don’t have an experience like that it leads us to go in other directions. In other words, maybe by not having the dream visitation yourself, even though your children have each had one, it’s going to lead you to go have an experience with a medium. Maybe you’ll go for a reading with a medium and you’ll have this amazing experience that could possibly be more profound to you than having a dream visitation.

Maybe your soul or your spirit guides understand that you are the type of person that will have the dream but then start to question it, question if it was real, was it just a dream or was it really him coming through to me? Whereas if you go to a medium who’s a complete stranger to you and this medium is now relaying information, details that only your loved one in spirit would know, memories that you and your husband share that few people in the world even know about, and now this medium’s sharing these things to you, you know, this is evidence that this medium is really communicating with your loved one in spirit. That might be more powerful to you than a dream visitation.

So what I see is that we have certain experiences that are going to help us along our path. So for instance, your son. Maybe this is something your son needed. Maybe there’s no way he’s ever going to go to a medium. Maybe he just has no interest in the kind of things that we talk about here on Afterlife TV, but this dream visitation is something that his father can give to him now, long before he ever gains an interest in this subject.

But you, you’re obviously listening to Afterlife TV, and maybe one of the reasons you’re listening to Afterlife TV is because you haven’t had this confirmation, and so therefore it’s pushing you, it’s leading you to learn more about life after death, to learn more about all the spiritual subjects that we talk about here and that you can read about and learn about in other places. That might be a good thing for you and that might be what’s important and that might be why you haven’t had this experience that you’re seeking. Basically what we’re talking about is it’s leading you on a journey of spiritual growth and awakening that you might possibly not have gone down if you had a dream visitation.

Of course, we’re speculating here. We don’t know. No one ever really knows until we pass and we go into the spirit world and we see things from a higher perspective. We can only guess, but I think that’s a pretty good guess, and so I wouldn’t take it personally that you haven’t had this experience. But do something that you can do, and one of the things you can do is go have a reading with a medium, and I highly recommend that that be a medium who is a stranger to you, who doesn’t know anything, because that’s really going to help you really know that what comes through is accurate and real.

Thanks so much for your question, Tammy. I hope that you get what you’re seeking, and I appreciate you sharing with us.

In the intro I talked about ways to raise our vibration. I talked about listening to uplifting music, hanging out with inspiring people, even watching sitcoms. One I did not mention is staying in the present moment. Well, I learned many lessons in hindsight of events that take place in my life, and I’ve written about many such lessons that I’ve gained from these events. Here’s one story that I’ll share with you. Let me know if you like this segment, because I have many more stories and lessons that I can share with you in other episodes.

I titled this story Trapped. One beautiful summer day Melissa and I took our Labrador mix, Libby, for a walk down our favorite dead-end road. It’s the perfect street for dog walking, since half the road has woods or ocean marsh on either side, and the other half is planted with multi-million dollar beachfront homes owned by people who live in other states. As a result, the street has very little traffic, even in the summer.

We were walking back to the car when Libby decided to venture off the road and onto a path in the woods, so we told her it was okay and followed close behind her. We were about to go on vacation for a week without her, so we were trying to get in as much Libby time as possible. The path went into a wildlife sanctuary, so it’s a peaceful wooded area. We didn’t have time to go far, as the sun was already setting, so we let Libby venture about 25 feet up the path.

Melissa said to me, “I love watching her sniff around and enjoying herself,” as Libby began pawing at some leaves and investigating with her nose. Suddenly a metal spring-loaded trap snapped shut on Libby’s right paw. Libby immediately started screeching in pain and trying to run away, but the trap was chained to the ground, so she couldn’t escape. Worse, every time she pulled her paw, the metal trap clamped tighter, causing her to panic and squeal all the more.

Melissa and I couldn’t believe our eyes. It took my mind a few seconds to acknowledge it. I thought, “A trap hidden under the leaves? Is this even possible? Is it legal?” We frantically dashed to Libby’s rescue, who was now wailing in pain. Melissa put her arms around Libby, trying to get her to stop pulling away from the trap. I instantly tried opening the contraption with my hands, but the springs were so tight I couldn’t pull it open by just pulling on its clenched jaws.

So I began looking for some kind of lever or switch that might release it. I glanced at Libby’s paw in the clutches of this cold-hearted appliance. Her toes were being crushed, and I feared that the damage inflicted by the teeth of this device might be permanent. All the while, I was having visions of rushing her to the animal emergency clinic located 45 minutes away, because all the vet centers were closed by this hour, as well as thoughts of her not being able to walk on her bandaged paw for months.

“What are we going to do,” I thought to myself. “We can’t possibly go on vacation now.” As I investigated the trap for a release button, Libby panicked and began shrieking at the top of her lungs again, further pulling on the trap and chain. Melissa calmed her one more time by hugging her tightly and talking to her quietly. At this point I was angry with myself for having no idea how these things work.

All I could see was one possible lever on the opposite end where Libby’s paw was jammed into this mechanism. So I pushed down on it really hard, and the trap opened a tiny bit. Although we couldn’t get Libby’s paw out of its clutches, it seemed to have eased some of the pressure. It was at this point that I noticed the trap didn’t actually have any teeth. It was a nasty clamp, but with no claws.

“Thank God,” I thought to myself. Having found the lever on the side of the trap, Libby was now calm, but obviously still in pain, and the metal jaws were still crushing her paw. Her nails were all jammed together like one big claw. As I held down on the lever, which required all of my strength, Melissa called the police on my cell phone. The desk clerk was little help by phone, but I held hope that a police officer might know how to open this damn thing when he or she arrived.

Melissa stayed on the phone with the police clerk while holding Libby to keep her still. The clerk told Melissa that traps are still legal but are carefully regulated, and she didn’t think they should be located in the middle of a path. Libby, now possibly in shock, decided to lie down. As she moved her position, I could finally see another lever under her paw located on the other side of the trap. At the risk of making things worse, since I had no idea how much pain it would cause her, I grabbed both levers and pressed down with all my might. The trap opened and released Libby’s paw.

Not knowing how badly injured her paw was, Melissa kept Libby lying down. Still envisioning a long night at the animal emergency hospital and a long road to recovery, I ran to the road to guide the policeman, as I could now see his car arriving through the trees. As he and I hurried back up the path to where Melissa and Libby were waiting, I saw that Libby was sitting upright, actually putting pressure on her right front paw. I was amazed. In fact, we were all amazed. It was a really good sign.

Cautiously we encouraged Libby to stand up and try walking, although I was scared to death of the pain that it might inflict. I could tell from Melissa’s facial expression that she feared the same. Astoundingly, Libby was able to walk. She didn’t even limp. In fact, as we all reached the road, you would have never known she was traumatized. Instead, Libby skipped around completely happy that she was free. She even began flirting with the police officer.

We got Libby home and she went right to bed. We checked her paw out immediately, and again the next morning, but she seemed to be okay. I’m sure she had some pain, yet going by our vet’s phone recommendation, we wiggled all her digits, and nothing made her flinch. Miraculously, nothing was broken, though we all felt the trauma of that incident for awhile.

The experience was a lesson for me in staying in the present moment. My own personal distress during the incident was surely made worse by my projecting into the future. Had I stayed in the present moment only, I wouldn’t have seen Libby suffering during the 45-minute ride to the animal emergency clinic, I wouldn’t have envisioned the teeth of the trap piercing the toes of her little paw and I wouldn’t have imagined her limping on a bandaged paw for weeks or months, barely able to make it outside to go to the bathroom. If I had kept my imagination at bay by remaining in the present moment, I would have experienced 15 to 20 minutes of trauma, and it would have been over. On the contrary, I experienced hours of stress on the way to the clinic and at the clinic and weeks of stress at home during Libby’s recovery, yet none of that really happened. None of it was real.

Sadly, the body and mind doesn’t know the difference between what’s real and what’s imagined. Physically and emotionally we react just as equally to both traumas, and as a result, we suffer unnecessarily, and therefore our stress levels increase, all because we haven’t learned how to stop projecting into the future of what might happen. Living in the now is an idea worth practicing. In fact, it’s so easy that even a dog can do it.

It’s hard to believe another episode of Afterlife TV is over already. I had a good time. I hope you enjoyed it. I want to thank Jessica for her story about her encounter with the spirit of Lorenzo, I want to thank Tammy for sharing her story and her question about dream visitations, and let me know if you enjoyed the story about Libby being trapped, only to serve as a great lesson to me about staying in the present moment. And be sure to leave your question for me if you have one about life after death, or if you want to share your story about the afterlife, we want to hear about it. They’re fun and enjoyable and a lot of people have let me know by comment or email that it’s something that they really like to hear on the show.

Finally, I’m just going to leave you with a final message to go out and have fun this week. How often do we just work and work and work, and we do errands and we take care of family, and we do whatever it is that we need to do, and we forget to go out and have fun? Every year around my birthday I like to go out bowling. I like my friends and family members and Melissa, of course, to go out and go to the bowling alley.

Hey I’m not a great bowler. It doesn’t matter. We just all get together. It’s something we can do. We can have a lot of laughs, we can have a lot of fun.

And I encourage you to do something like that that you haven’t done in awhile. If there’s one thing we’ve learned by studying life after death, it’s that life is short, so go out and have a good time before it’s over, okay? Have a great week. Thanks for listening.

I want to thank our sponsor today, This is the only place on the internet where you can find over 800 psychics and mediums and Tarot readers and animal communicators and energy healers all located in one place. You can also read public reviews about the psychics and mediums. Each person listed there has been screened and approved by a private investigator. Hmm, I wonder who that guy is. And you can either schedule a reading privately, or my personal favorite, you can get an instant reading. You go to, you can see who’s available for an instant reading right now.

Announcer: That’s all for another fantastic Afterlife TV episode. Bob couldn’t be happier. If you enjoyed this episode as much as Bob, please leave a comment on, Facebook, Twitter or YouTube, and don’t forget to check out Bob’s book, “Answers about the Afterlife.” Thanks for watching Afterlife TV.

Afterlife TV is presented by Afterlife Investigator & Psychic Medium Researcher Bob Olson, who is the author of Answers about the Afterlife: A Private Investigator’s 15-Year Research Unlocks the Mysteries of Life after Death.

Check out Bob Olson’s other sites: (a directory of hundreds of psychics & mediums by location with reviews & Instant Readings) & (his personal recommended list of tested psychics and mediums) or visit Bob’s Facebook Page. Bob also has a popular workshop for psychics and mediums at

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