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Why Spirits Refuse To Visit Some People — Afterlife TV

Afterlife TV Bite-Sized Episode (13 minutes): Ever wonder why people in spirit send signs or signals to some people and not others? Or why they visited your sibling’s dream but never came to you while sleeping? It’s a valid question and a common one. Prompted by a story from one of our lovely Afterlife TV audience members, I reveal the key reasons your deceased loved one might not visit you from the spiritual realm in this bite-sized episode from the vault.

Photos in video generously provided by the lovely and amazing, Melissa Olson.

Serving you extra helpings of love this week,
Bob Olson AfterlifeTV.com and BobOlson.com

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Afterlife TV is presented by Afterlife Investigator & Psychic Medium Researcher Bob Olson, who is the author of Answers about the Afterlife: A Private Investigator’s 15-Year Research Unlocks the Mysteries of Life after Death.

Check out Bob Olson’s other sites: BestPsychicDirectory.com (a directory of hundreds of psychics & mediums by location with reviews & Instant Readings) & BestPsychicMediums.com (his personal recommended list of tested psychics and mediums) or visit Bob’s Facebook Page. Bob also has a popular workshop for psychics and mediums at PsychicMediumWorkshop.com.

Don’t miss another Afterlife TV episode. Join our email list to get new video announcements (and to download a free excerpt of Bob’s book): CLICK HERE TO SIGN UP FOR NEWSLETTER.


Bob: Hey, everybody. Bob Olson here with “Afterlife TV.” This is where we talk about the big questions you have concerning life and death. You can find this and every episode at afterlifetv.com.

Bob: Hey everybody, Bob Olson here. I want to thank our sponsor BestPsychicDirectory.com, This is where you can find over 800 psychics and mediums and Tarot readers and animal communicators and energy healers all in one place. You can look them up by location, you can look them up by specialty, you can read public reviews about them, and you can either schedule a reading with them directly or get an instant reading. That means get a reading right there on the site with whoever’s available at that very moment. Again, BestPsychicDirectory.com.

I also want to thank you for listening, and I also want to thank you especially for your really incredibly loving and supportive and enthusiastic comments on Facebook and YouTube and AfterlifeTV.com and Twitter.

Tammy: Hi Bob. My name is Tammy, and my story is about my ex-husband, who at the age of 49 died of a massive heart attack in his sleep. That was unfortunate enough, but my son, 19 years old at the time, was the one that found him. It was very traumatic for all of us involved, and we still struggle with it to this day.

My son has told me that his dad has come to him in dream state. He told me about a dream that happened shortly after where he was crying and holding onto his dad like it happened when he found him, but then in his dream his dad came up behind him and was holding him as he was holding the body, comforting him. I said that was probably him there letting you know that he was with you at that moment.

Our daughter has also had dreams of him visiting and in some way trying to comfort and let her know. I talk to him and think about him every day. Had 18 years with the man and two children. Regardless of a divorce, there’s a connection.

He doesn’t come to me in dream and hasn’t ever come to me in dream, and I wonder, is it because we got divorced that doesn’t? Because, again, I talk to him and ask, “Please come to me and just let me know that you’re okay. I’d love to know that, just to reassure the kids and myself, you’ve made it and that you’re happy.” And again, he hasn’t. I don’t know if I want it too bad or what is the reason, but I would really give anything to have a reading and know that he’s made it okay and confirmation that he’s there. Thank you for your time.

Bob: Thank you so much, Tammy, for sharing your son’s story, for relaying that your daughter has also had dream visitations and your question about why your ex-husband hasn’t come to you. Now, I kind of referred to this when we heard Jessica’s story, because in that case it was an ex as well, and so I hope that kind of answers through example your question about, has he not come to me in my dream because he was my ex-husband, because we got divorced? No, that’s not why he didn’t come to you in your dream, I’m sure of it.

There are many reasons why people don’t come to us in our dreams while they might go to other people that we know in their dreams. I actually answer that question in the book. I’m going to read the answer to that question and then I’m going to come back to your specific situation. On page 129 of “Answers about the Afterlife,” my book that answers 150 questions that people have about life after death, about spirits, about what their particular loved one in spirit wants or needs, all kinds of questions, including a lot of questions that people have about near-death experiences and mediums, past lives.

It’s all in there, but on page 129 we talk specifically about this question that so many people have, why did my loved one in spirit visit my sibling in a dream but not me? And you could replace sibling with my children, my friend, any other relative. Doesn’t really matter. In this case I used sibling just for the example. And my answer is there’s never any guarantee that your loved one in spirit will visit you in a dream, but you can certainly request it. Pray to your loved one and ask if they could come to you while dreaming. If they know you’re open to it and can handle it, it might happen.

Now Tammy I know that that’s something you’ve already done, so let’s keep reading and see what applies to you. I actually think the very last part of the answer for this question is what applies to you, but here we go. I’ll continue. Most people believe they would like to have a dream visitation, but you might not be as open to the experience as you may think. For one, you must be open-minded enough in terms of skepticism to allow it. Skepticism can ward off such dreams simply because you don’t believe it.

Have you ever looked all over for your car keys or sunglasses only to realize that they were right in the spot you looked all along? Many people have had this experience, and it’s because they didn’t believe their keys or sunglasses were going to be in that spot that they never saw them. This is the power of skepticism. Your loved ones in spirit know best if you might be scared by the experience of a dream visitation or confused by it, but if you are open minded and wouldn’t be scared by a visit from your loved one in your dreams, it is much more likely to occur. Your sibling might be more open to a dream visitation or might need it more.

My guess is that it’s not an easy task to show up in your dreams. So spirits are going to save it for those people who really need the experience. If your beliefs are such that you already know your loved one is okay, then it’s not necessary that your loved one in spirit endure the extra effort to appear in your dream.

On the other hand, some people dream differently than others. For instance, I rarely ever remember my dreams. So it might be a big waste of time for one of my loved ones in spirit to visit me that way. Thus, who gets a dream visitation and who doesn’t might depend on our dreaming habits. Some of us just might not dream appropriately for a dream visitation to be possible. If you’re someone who never really sleeps very deeply, this might be an issue.

Finally, because the purpose of life is experience, having a dream visitation might not be an experience your soul wants you to have. Every experience we have could lead us in a new direction. If your soul knows that you are more likely to stay on the path intended for your life by not having the dream visitation, then your soul won’t allow it, because it’s in your best interest not to experience one. On the other hand, if having a dream visitation is an experience that will benefit your life’s plan, then the possibility of having one is much greater.

In the end, I wouldn’t take it personally that your loved one visited your sibling in her dream and not you. Look at the glass as half full and be happy that your loved one showed up in anyone’s dream. Now your family has had direct contact as evidence that your loved one happily exists in the afterlife. That’s a wonderful gift regardless of who had the dream.

I think that last part certainly speaks directly to you, Tammy. I know that you sort of mentioned that you’d like for your ex-husband to come to you in your dream so that you and the kids would know he’s okay. I think the kids know that he’s okay, because they were visited by their father, but I think this is something you want for you, and it’s okay to say that. That’s not selfish. That’s something that you feel like you could really use in your life. But that second to the last paragraph where I talk about having the dream visitation might not be an experience your soul wants you to have, this could possibly be the case.

I’ll give you an example. If someone was to have a dream visitation, that might give them the confirmation that they need that their loved one is okay, that might give them the peace of mind that they’re seeking in relation to their loss, but sometimes when we don’t have an experience like that it leads us to go in other directions. In other words, maybe by not having the dream visitation yourself, even though your children have each had one, it’s going to lead you to go have an experience with a medium. Maybe you’ll go for a reading with a medium and you’ll have this amazing experience that could possibly be more profound to you than having a dream visitation.

Maybe your soul or your spirit guides understand that you are the type of person that will have the dream but then start to question it, question if it was real, was it just a dream or was it really him coming through to me? Whereas if you go to a medium who’s a complete stranger to you and this medium is now relaying information, details that only your loved one in spirit would know, memories that you and your husband share that few people in the world even know about, and now this medium’s sharing these things to you, you know, this is evidence that this medium is really communicating with your loved one in spirit. That might be more powerful to you than a dream visitation.

So what I see is that we have certain experiences that are going to help us along our path. So for instance, your son. Maybe this is something your son needed. Maybe there’s no way he’s ever going to go to a medium. Maybe he just has no interest in the kind of things that we talk about here on Afterlife TV, but this dream visitation is something that his father can give to him now, long before he ever gains an interest in this subject.

But you, you’re obviously listening to Afterlife TV, and maybe one of the reasons you’re listening to Afterlife TV is because you haven’t had this confirmation, and so therefore it’s pushing you, it’s leading you to learn more about life after death, to learn more about all the spiritual subjects that we talk about here and that you can read about and learn about in other places. That might be a good thing for you and that might be what’s important and that might be why you haven’t had this experience that you’re seeking. Basically what we’re talking about is it’s leading you on a journey of spiritual growth and awakening that you might possibly not have gone down if you had a dream visitation.

Of course, we’re speculating here. We don’t know. No one ever really knows until we pass and we go into the spirit world and we see things from a higher perspective. We can only guess, but I think that’s a pretty good guess, and so I wouldn’t take it personally that you haven’t had this experience. But do something that you can do, and one of the things you can do is go have a reading with a medium, and I highly recommend that that be a medium who is a stranger to you, who doesn’t know anything, because that’s really going to help you really know that what comes through is accurate and real.

Thanks so much for your question, Tammy. I hope that you get what you’re seeking, and I appreciate you sharing with us.

So that’s another episode of “Afterlife TV.” Thank you for joining us. Please like us on Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube or sign up for our newsletter at afterlifetv.com so you don’t miss our next episode. See you next time


Afterlife TV is presented by Afterlife Investigator & Psychic Medium Researcher Bob Olson, who is the author of Answers about the Afterlife: A Private Investigator’s 15-Year Research Unlocks the Mysteries of Life after Death.

Check out Bob Olson’s other sites: BestPsychicDirectory.com (a directory of hundreds of psychics & mediums by location with reviews & Instant Readings) & BestPsychicMediums.com (his personal recommended list of tested psychics and mediums) or visit Bob’s Facebook Page. Bob also has a popular workshop for psychics and mediums at PsychicMediumWorkshop.com.

Don’t miss another Afterlife TV episode. Join our email list to get new video announcements (and to download a free excerpt of Bob’s book): CLICK HERE TO SIGN UP FOR NEWSLETTER.

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